She got through it by fighting.
By screaming she needed to “get the fuck outta here”.
By begging for it all to stop.
She got through it by hissing at those of us trying to help with her eyes wide and wild.
By shoving our hands and our attempted words of comfort away.
By spitting at us.
She got through it by purposely swinging her head around and vomiting all over the front of my shirt.
By screaming that she needed to go for a cigarette.
By relaxing a little only when she was finally, mercifully given an epidural.
Fentanyl infused to help with the violence of laboring.
She got through it by screaming her baby out of her vagina.
By turning her head away from her newborn when he was out.
She got through it by finally ripping out frantically tubes and IVs.
By leaving the hospital against medical advice.
She got through it the only way she could.
© Sarah Chantler Baughman, doula, 2015
Violence is pervasive across the lifespan of women, a global epidemic in fact, with pregnancy being a particularly high risk time for the impacts of historical and/or current & ongoing abuse to manifest. However, the collective response of the *birthing community has been to remain silent, claiming for the most part, that this topic resides outside of the doula’s scope of practice. Continue reading